Avoid my Drunk Dial List...

Be warned, this is an example of a drunk dial I sent to a close friend:

"Hello, hey, so, I don’t know if you can even hear me but I’m just calling to say hi. The movie just got out, it was entertaining. Um, ya I told you I was going to see a movie, right? Uh, the one with Bruce Campbell you know about the dead Necronomicon and he went back in the past and stuff, cuz they have like a drink special. And ya, and remember I told you a girls name and I told you to check out Facebook to see what you thought…but you know…mmmm…what was I going to say—oh ya, campin’. It’s gonna be fun campin’…campin’ that’s how Jason pronounces it…campin’….Jason’s my brother, you know that right? And I’m pretty much just going to talk until either I go to use the bathroom or your messages cut me off. So if you’re listening to this, you don’t have to keep listening 'cuz I’m not going to remember what I said. Oh ya and I also so wanted to post my fucking video today, but my computer sucks. And it doesn’t suck in a good way it’s like bad sucking…like a vacuum with teeth or whatever sucks in a bad way, a vampire with murderous intentions. Does that make sense? Meaning like a vampire who sucks but doesn’t kill makes you become a vampire and I could live forever you know, I could watch my friends grow old and die…actually I wouldn’t have to, I’d just go someplace else, cuz I’m a fucking vampire and I…wait, I’m going off on a tangent. Shit. Um, ya I’m going to go ahead and let you go now because your probably playing this message like over and over trying to understand my words and I don’t even know if you can hear me…I don’t even know if me…"

Wow, a grain of humor in a disconnected jumble. Apparently that movie reminded me of vampires. And what's with the profanity, sheesh.